Is suicide selfish?

I was sad over Christmas. Now not only is my sister gone, but also my good mate Lovely. I feel like I know I am not supposed to say this, but it seems pretty selfish to me. I know my good colleague who also has experience of suicide would disown me for even posing the question, but ultimately I feel let down. I feel pissed off with her, if things were so bad why didn't she tell me. Get help. Tell her therapist the day beforehand. She did in fact tell her therapist the day beforehand, but when asked if she was serious about suicide and would follow her plan through lovely said 'no'. That was a lie. It was a lie when she pretended to be normal and bubbly to me ten minutes before she did it. So I feel like I have a right to be annoyed at that, and a right to label her as somewhat selfish.

This is our group chat on the day before she died:
lovely: love you all xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Honestly: we love you toooooooo x
Me: I'm at Honestly's and we just had dinner!!!!!!!

As you can see, I am ever the skilled conversationalist!

The day Lovely died, August 29th 2014
Me: Princess, Honestly said last night that you have a choice of 3 audition songs.... What are they and do you have a fav? I'd like to think I'd sing Aerosmith and be really arrogant like Steven Tyler but realistically it would be terrible as I'd turn into a scared mouse.
princess: Geek any news on baby's arrival?
lovely: Isn't consultant appointment on Monday? Did you and Xss come up with dates and times. Be great if you can just say, 'I'd like a baby on 5th at 3pm' just like a haircut!not quite like a haircut. Xxx
Honestly: I need a haircut!
Lovely: Just book it in like Geek! Xxx

Then in The following ten minutes she put down her phone, did whatever last bits she needed to do, tied her scarf around her neck and hung herself from the banisters. As she hung there we continued this conversation with inane comments about what audition songs we'd sing.

honestly: I'd do dolly!
Me: yeah! To Dolly. lovely would you do Kinikie? Hahah. Seriously though if the dr says I can have a section on, say, Thursday morning do you think it would be ok to say, 'do you have something a bit later in the day?' I'd like a Thursday morning late enough to drop Starbucks off at nursery at 9 first.

And my life continued as normal......